Mission Accomplished #2

As of 1:00 PM July 22, 2007
I am officially in my new place.

I am nowhere near finished making it livable, but everything from my previous apartment has been moved into my new place.

I spent Friday evening packing up the last of my stuff and taking bookshelves and other furniture downstairs to the small storage room in the garage. Saved me a LOT of work going up and down 3 flights of steps on Saturday.

For those who have never been to my place, the ground floor is the parking and storage areas, the 2^nd being regular apartments and the 3^rd being townhouse units. The one I was in was a 1-bedroom with a loft. The loft overlooked the living room and kitchen areas and was my room. (BTW, word of advice, never get an apartment where the bathroom is not on the same floor as the bedroom, 3 AM pees are a pain)

I managed to not only get the remainder of the furniture and miscellaneous stuff loaded in about 2 1/2 hours but made it over the hill and unloaded it all by myself (I'm just getting so butch).

Now I am in the process of figuring out where I want everything to go and start determining the furniture I am going to have to get. Several of the girls have offered to help (why am I so frightened of that?).

To celebrate, my friend Judy and I went to the Hollywood Forever Cemetery and saw "Dressed to Kill" with Angie Dickinson and Michael Caine. It's part of Cinespia's summer screening program. If you have never been, try it...

Later...

Professional Driver Whining #1

My roommate made a comment the other day that really caught me for some reason. She said that she never thought the driving in Los Angeles was really that bad until she had worked as a sedan driver for the company I now work for. After spending several hours a day on the roads, you really get a few glimpses into just what makes for a lousy driver.

1. I'd rather see someone applying make-up behind the wheel than be on the blasted cell phone.
2. A flashing turn signal should mean you intend to change lanes, not that you like flashing little lights in front of you.
3. A turn signal on the freeway should not cause your latest burst of macho to mean you must speed up since no-one should change into your lane in front of you.
4. When someone is pulling onto the on-ramp, they are responsible to get up to traffic speed, not traffic slow for them.
5. If your SUV is so big that you are afraid of driving it, DON'T!
6. The center lanes of the freeway are for the faster cars, it is not your job to slow them to 35 mph.
7. When turning, pull as far over to the side as you can so others may pass you while you wait for an opening in traffic.
8. Red lights ALWAYS mean stop, even if only for a moment.
9. Checking the map for directions should be done while pulled over to the side of the road, not in the middle of traffic.
10. If the car in front of you has zoned for a moment, toot your horn. Going into a coma and falling on it is overkill.
11. If you wish to get courtesy from others on the road, it is best to give it. Not everyone is a selfish pain in the butt like you are and after a while you will find it does pay off.
12. When you mess up on the road, don't look at the other as if they are an idiot for thinking you know what you are doing (or are they? Hmmmm).
    

Can you tell that it has been a fun day driving around town today.

The move is coming along well and may actually be finished by the end of the week. Just depends on how many trips from Mar Vista to Sherman Oaks I get to make in the next few days and the rental of a U-Haul. Hope springs eternal.

BRB

As I let you know previously, I found an amazing apartment in Sherman Oaks and am trying to get everything packed and moved ASAP. No reason except that I just want it over with, I truly hate moving.

I'll be back as fast as I can since I have Internet Access already set up at the new place...

A little something for you to chuckle at... Enjoy...

Perception Notes

I seem to forget how much of our existence and how we process it is related to perception. A recent (as in last night) example really brought it to the forefront.

I have been looking for an apartment and as of about 8 pm last night, I found one and was accepted. That's awesome!!!

This is where the perception came in. There was someone that I needed to tell about the new place and while I hoped they would be happy for me, I thought there might be a problem since the person I needed to inform and my new landlord have a history and have had a few bumps in the road as of late. Because of this, I thought it would be best to not open a possible can of worms unless there was a reason to, like getting the apartment.

The party involved didn't feel this way. They felt that I was creating a problem where there wasn't one and that I had made myself a victim. I don't claim to know everything that goes on in people's lives and can only go by what they say, my hunches and instincts. From my perspective, I was trying to be kind and courteous until needed.

There was a few other issues as to my previous lack of enthusiasm (I understate it a bit) for moving into the San Fernando Valley. I had lived in Canoga Park until the Northridge Earthquake and then in North Hollywood for a few years and hadn't really liked it. The heat, the bad air and the Valley just wasn't any fun for the most part. Funny that I had this conversation a total of three times, my friend who told me about the apartment, the new landlord and their friend who I started with.

My friend told me about it and since I wasn't having much luck finding much beyond a closet for the rent that I was looking to pay, I figured it couldn't hurt to look at it. What I saw surprised me:

• 2 Bedrooms
• Huge Bathroom with both a Shower and Tub (not 2 in 1)
• Large Livingroom
• Large Kitchen
• Washer and Dryer built in (sort of)
• A Fireplace (both gas and wood)
• A small yard
• lots of windows and some view

To put it simply, I would have been a fool to pass it up. I think I am going to be able to make a home out of this place and shouldn't want to leave for a long time,

The initial announcement was greeted a bit roughly, but after some discussion peace was attained. A couple of things struck me a bit.

One was the statement that "I have an answer for everything." How could I not? When we do things, shouldn't we know why and be able to explain if our intentions or actions are misunderstood by others? Do most people just act without knowing why? Are most people as truly reactive as the Church of Scientology makes out? (I have to admit, it would explain a few things about most people)

The other was that I am secretive. Now I tried to explain to them that I am completely open and that they knew nearly everything there was to know. My life is pretty uneventful unless they wanted to know about folding my laundry earlier in the day.

Perception is so fundamental in how we deal with the world around us and yet, we are so ingrained with it that we don't realize it and hold other as slaves to our perceptions of situations. You mean well, but I feel slighted. I tell you everything but get the impression you don't want as much so I close a bit and you perceive it as being secretive.

We need to become aware of our perceptions of things and address them as they pop up and try not to use ours as a weapon against those who perceive themselves just as well as we. This goes for victimhood as well, we perceive that state and may choose to live there but don't make the people around you pay for it; it's not their debt but yours.

Victimhood SUCKS!!!

I had a couple of interesting conversations today that brought up an interesting subject: victimhood.

Several years ago, I lived with a guy who loved being in control of nearly everything around him. He volunteered at the local community center and was also on the board, his boyfriend was very hot, but also passive. To look at him, he had everything going for him, except... With all this going for him, he always avoided the other side of control, to the point where I bought him a t-shirt one year for his birthday that read, "I want all the power and none of the responsibility."

We live in a culture where that has nearly become the new national slogan. Sadly, I think it is also becoming our new export and the world seems to be eating it up.

People are always talking about rights, though most of the time what they are really talking about is privileges our rights afford us. The sad part is that where we want all those rights and privileges, we downright refuse to take on the responsibilities that come along as repercussions.

I see people all the time who perform some action and when the obvious outcome comes along, they cannot imagine why. Now, to be honest, these are things that when they touch you, we have a natural instinct to pull away and deny. When we can't deny, we tend to lash back and get very unhappy with the messenger, so get prepared to be unhappy with me...

From the person who needs to get off the couch and eat better who can't imagine why they suddenly have a heart attack and need bypass surgery. To the person who self-medicates themselves with drugs and/or alcohol and suddenly finds themselves in the pits of addiction. Sadly, these are the simpler and easier to deal with.

We get to the larger and more culturally sensitive ones like the racial minority that creates a separatist culture and then wonders why they don't succeed from within the predominant culture. Of course if you say this in public, you are immediately labeled a racist and marginalized by those who either don't know better, or worse, by those that have a vested interest in keeping things as they are perceived or represented to be.

To another group that doesn't want anything more than a better life for themselves and their families but can't or won't recognize the fact that breaking the law to enter the country illegally to pursue the dream of becoming a law abiding citizen just doesn't work. We will use this one as an example for the moment.

As with most things, life is truly about perception. How you view and associate details makes an amazing difference in one's day-to-day existence. Using the above example, one of the "arguments" used to soften the hearts of their opponents goes like this:

Poppa came to the country as an illegal 15 years ago and made a living and stayed out of trouble. He met Momma and got married and had a few children. Now Poppa may be sent back to his country of origin, do you really want to break up this family?

Of course not and I feel for all the parties involved, but wouldn't the object lesson be just as valid to say to the children, that Poppa broke the law a long time ago and though he meant well, they have a tendency to catch up to us and eventually one has to pay for their misdeeds. Unfortunately, he is no longer the only one that will have to pay the penalties of the heart.

Both options suck, but one teaches that there are consequences for our actions, a fact of the universe, and the other teaches a false lesson of questionable entitlement.

The other day I heard a new one that just about made me fall out of my chair I was laughing so hard. The newest group of "victims" were the Christian Right in America since they are under attack in what started as the "War on Christmas" and now has become the "War on Christianity." Now everyone is officially a victim, no one is responsible and yet we all still want to know why things are as messed up as they are?

This victimhood idea is like a narcotic in that it is a very powerful thing. It is SOOO easy to acquire power through it and once tasted, like the forbidden fruit, next to impossible to put down.

The easy power of being a victim kind of reminds me of a friend that tried shooting-up heroine one time and decided that he would never do it again. When I asked him why, had he not liked it? He said, "No, just the opposite. I liked it too much and don't think I would be able to stop if I did it again." A very wise man indeed.

If one truly seeks power, do it the old fashioned way, earn it. It carries just as much weight and actually has some substance behind it. Plus, be honest, it seems to be human nature that people don't respect what they get for free, only what they pay for. What people get for free they tend to abuse.

Being caucasian and male, to listen to most of the "Victim" groups, I am the cause of their lot in life. I am "raised" to hold other races down and to judge people by the color of their skin, their gender, religion, financial status, sexual orientation, ad nauseam. Somehow I must have missed those lessons, I got the ones that said that everyone deserved a fair shake and that by combining whatever talents I may have, with knowledge and skills that I acquire along the way, that in the final analysis, it was by my efforts or lack thereof that determines my success or failure in the world.

I hear members of these minority or marginalized groups talk and you walk away with the idea that no person of __________ (fill in the blank) ever failed in whatever endeavor they set out upon due to lack of personal ability, skill or effort; but only by being held back by "the man."

The fact is, that racism, sexism or some other criterion of judgment will always exist in a small minority of people since they will use it it as a way to make themselves feel better about who and what they are. Miserable self-images spawn pre-judgment in an effort to prop up self-identity as a matter of simplicity, you're bad, hence I'm good.

It's kind of strange to me, but I was told that if I was to succeed in this world, it would be by my efforts alone, the world would give me what I needed, but little more. I find the unifying idea taught in "victimized" groups to be that you are unable to succeed on your own and are entitled to extra help based upon some wrong-doing in the past, real or perceived.

Terrible things have been done to people by people for as long as mankind has been around, the question is when do you stop being so focussed on what's behind you that you miss what's in front of you.

Someone said (ok actually many have said something along the same line) that if you have one foot in yesterday and the other in tomorrow, you are going to pee all over today. I say, if you are so focussed on the past that you can't see the present, you will miss the future.

I find that if you expect things in your life, they tend to show up. We are the children of a Creating God and as such create constantly. If we spend our time and focus expecting bad things, don't be surprised when bad things happen.

If you want to be a victim of your past and not get beyond that, fine, that is one of those privileges that living in the USA gives you. But word of advice, don't whine to me about it. After a while I'l tell you to either figure out where to change it and get something new or shut up, I'm tired of hearing the same record repeating itself.

Remember that ALL choices have repercussions and if you don't want to deal with them, then don't set them in motion. Karma, reaping what you sow, etc are identical to Newton's 3rd law of Motion: "For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction." Be a victim and expect to be victimized, but know there is an alternative.

Benjamin Franklin said that "if we forget the past we are condemned to repeat it." I'm not advocating forgetting anything, just don't be so absorbed in it that you condemn yourself to live there forever, of course unless you want to--your choice.

Thoughts on July 4th (almost)

Well, in just over 2 hours it will be the 4th of July (yippie yippie yeah) and what am I doing? I'm sitting on my bed, typing a blog entry while listening to "Steel Magnolias" for the um-teen-millionth time and yet, I still have a good time with it.

For those who may not live in the United States of the Corporation (oops sorry, of America), we are supposedly going to celebrate the freedoms that our founding fathers fought and, in some cases, died for. I sometimes wonder what they would think of what has become of their great political experiment.

One of the three best selling books of the 19th century was a book called "Democracy in America" by Alexis de Tocqueville. It's a book that I think every American should be required to read. Not only does it give an amazingly accurate picture of what this country could become, it also gives many warnings about the possible pitfalls that the country could avoid if watched for. As with any author, I don't always agree with everything, but it's definitely in the right ballpark. Strange that people almost never heed the warnings of those who give good advice.

Not just in politics (from the Latin poli meaning many and ticks being small blood-sucking creatures) but our religions do likewise. We have these great and noble teachers who say they have knowledge that will help us find salvation, our true nature or just a better way of doing things in general, so what do we do? We kill them, pervert their teachings till the truth in them is nearly indecipherable and then run around killing anyone who might have a clue to what they are all saying in the first place--strange breed we humans are aint we?

So what does all this have to do with the 4th of July? We are living in an age where the freedom of speech is slowly being whittled away at in the name of Political Correctness (PC) which I definitely do NOT believe in. It's one thing to be considerate of the feeling of those around you, but the idea that you have some right to never hear something you might find offensive or unsettling is laughable in its ridiculousness. The fact is that there are times when you need to be completely rattled and hear something you are going to hate, but need to hear.

While it's not there yet, we are being guided in a direction that could very easily turn into a Christian theocracy if we are not careful. I'm not a harbinger of doom,so I don't worry about it, but as Jesus warned his disciples, know the signs of the times to see what's happening around you (ok, it's a questionable paraphrase of Matthew 16:2-3 but you get the point). Now why would I worry about a theocratic state since I am a spiritual student? (You ever see "John Carpenter's Escape from L.A."? A particular view of Christianity becomes the law and any other sects and religions are banished to a prison island. Yes, I'm quite aware that it is only a movie, but the point is obvious in its outlandishness.) As the ability to express differing opinions is slowly diminished, people like myself may find our outlets decreasing. What and who's truth will be allowed.

It's not possible? I hope you are right, but in the new world of conglomerate news, how many differing opinions do you hear? There are a few that tell a different side of the story but little by little, there voices are being made to carry the "official party line."